First 3 Weeks in Madison

I was talking to Ben just now about how I was thinking about starting to write again. About how I want to start writing articles and send them into magazines, maybe start playwriting again. And then he said "Oh you didn't tell me that. I mean, I knew about your blog thing." Oh yeah....my blog thing! I hadn't forgotten about it, I just felt like I didn't have anything to post. But, silly me, OF COURSE I HAVE STUFF TO POST! So, here it goes.

My time off after Brownville was amazing and sad all at the same time. Amazing because I got to spend time with a lot of awesome people and because I got to rest up a lot after a very busy summer. But sad because I missed my Brownville people and because I found myself losing focus. I have this tendency to lose my direction when I have too much time. This is one of the reasons I like being busy. Almost too busy. Because I don't like feeling lazy or out of touch with myself or the world.

My first two weeks were spent in Topeka, KS where I got to spend some quality time with family. I stayed at my Uncle Fred and Aunt Sandy's who were nice enough to let me crash at their home. I spent a good week recovering from Brownville and my post-Brownville sickness which was nice enough to wait until I was done performing to attack me with its sinus pressure, sneezing, stuffy nose, and general fatigue. I also had my sting to tend to. You see, a few days before Brownville was over I got stung by something and had a really bad reaction to it. It took roughly a week and a half to really clear up. In Topeka, I spent my time running little errands, hanging out with Granny and other family members, helping get everything together for her 90th birthday party, and taking a well deserved break. The party was really cool. I helped set up the picture slideshow presentation my sister made and then spent most of my time at the Guest Book telling people they should sign it, showing them where to put cards/gifts, where they could find refreshments, and just generally chatting them up about their lives and their relation to Granny (or even me!). It was a very fascinating job to have and I had a lot of fun doing it. I love talking to people, getting to know them, even if it is just for a little while. It was also great to see a lot of family I don't get to see very often. I miss the days of playing hide and seek at Jackson Family Christmas in Dave and Annette's basement. We were just passing the time until we could FINALLY pass out and open the gifts. Fond, blurry memories of days gone by.

I then spent 2 weeks in Stevens Point to spend time with my boyfriend and all my old college friends. It was so much fun. I really loved being able to spend time with them again and felt both happy and sad. Happy to see them all, happy I graduated...but sad that I couldn't have graduated with THEM! Don't get me wrong. I needed to graduate. I am glad I did. But when you are a transfer and you come in with one class, but graduate with the class ahead of you...everything just doesn't quite feel right. I liked the people I graduated with, but I never felt like I was a part of them. Probably because I wasn't. Because I was...and AM...a part of the graduating class of 2013. The class I came in with. The class I laughed with, cried with, learned with, and grew with. Oh well. Such is life. I will watch their senior year from afar with a smile on my face and joy in my heart. I will celebrate their successes and mourn their woes. I just won't be a part of them. It was really interesting to be in Point while everyone else was in the midst of classes, auditions, orientation, and moving back. Yet, I didn't have to worry about those things. I felt both free and sad. Nostalgic. Bittersweet.

I also got to spend a lot of time with Ben, which was REALLY REALLY needed after being so far apart the entire summer. I mean, we not only had to deal with being 10 hours apart, but we also had to deal with me not having any cell phone reception. And when I did, I could only call at certain times because I was so busy and the call would drop a lot since service was so terrible out there. But we made do. In fact, we did BETTER than that. He came to see me for my birthday weekend and that was absolutely AMAZING! And we tried to talk everyday. If not on the phone, then at least via Facebook message. Which is why I am so glad I live in a world where technology is on my side. So we were able to "stay close" even if we were so far apart. So when I got up to Point, it was amazing because we hadn't gotten to spend a lot of time together over the summer. But nothing felt awkward because we still talked everyday. (Gushing about to ensue...reader beware) It felt...right. Being able to hold his hand again, talk to him in person, just BE with him. Everything felt right. And now we know that with me being in Madison, I will not only have cell phone reception, but will also only be two hours away. If we can do 10 hours away with no cell phone reception for 3 months, we can certainly do 2 hours away easily. We had a great time seeing friends together, singing karaoke, touring the Point Brewery, watching movies, cooking, and just having fun!

And then I went to Madison....

I ended up not being able to find a place of my own in Madison, so for now I am staying with an acquaintance of my sister's- Phyllis, and her husband John. They also house a college graduate student named Anna, who is also new to Madison. They have been some of the most kind and generous people. Not only in terms of letting me stay at their house, join in their meals, etc. But also generous in spirit. They always ask about how my day was- rejoice in my successes, empathize with my failures. They try to help me in any way they can whether it be giving me directions, buying me food, or paying for my ticket to see a play until I can pay them back. They listen to my stories, I listen to their's. And they are FASCINATING people. I am glad I got to stay with them and though I still want to find a place of my own and one on the East side so that my drive to work isn't so long everyday, I am happy that I at least got to stay with some wonderful people in the mean time.

Work is....different. Right now, it takes a lot of self motivation. Since the program hasn't started yet, I am spending most of my time coming up with ideas for things to do once it DOES start. Lots of planning. Lots of brainstorming. As an AmeriCorps member, I have to recruit at least 20 volunteers on my own and I have to do one-on-one tutoring with at least 10 kids for an hour a week each. I can't start tutoring really until the program starts. And recruiting volunteers takes a lot of planning and navigating. I have started the volunteer recruitment process, but haven't had too much luck yet. Things will fall into place eventually. This job is going to be one of those "Figure it out as you go" jobs. But that's okay. It will all fall into place before I know it.

Madison itself...is growing on me. It, once again, did NOT make a good first impression. Streets are confusing, traffic can be difficult, and living on the west side does not make it easy when you work on the east side. However, the people are all SUPER nice and welcoming. And I am starting to figure out how to get from one place to another. So....you live, you learn.

In the meantime, I have been doing lots of things. Reading- I finished Crime and Punishment and am now on to The Princess Bride. Writing- Well...more like...planning to write. But I will get around to it soon! This blog post, for example, is a step in the right direction. Exploring- Trying to experience Madison! Auditioning- I auditioned for the Four Seasons Theatre here in Madison. I auditioned for She Loves Me and Avenue Q and got called back for both. My Ilona callback for She Loves Me was a little rough, but my Avenue Q callback for Lucy The Slut was AWESOME! So...we'll see how that turns out. I have a few other auditions in the works, so we will see what happens.

Today, a little girl at the school pointed at my mismatched socks and said "Do you think it's opposite day or something?" as she swung back and forth on the swingset. I love kids. Especially elementary age kids. It dawned on me in that moment that I am right where I need to be at this point in life.